Sadly, most women (myself included) have struggled at some time and on some level with body image and the idea of beauty. The ludicrous and dishonest portrayal of women’s beauty in the media doesn’t help any. None of us are unaffected by these images, however hard we try, and our young daughters, terrifyingly, certainly aren’t.
For me, the most poignant aspect of this issue is quite how many women feel (or at some point in their lives have felt) inadequate and anxious about whether they conform to the media-held idea of beauty. I have. Most women I know have. For some, this can mean a lifetime of anxiety and struggles with weight and appearance, a distorted view of our own self, even severe eating disorders.
Not everyone is affected to this level, but I defy any ‘western’ woman not to be in some way influenced or affected by beauty and body angst in some form, at some point in her life, as a result of the image of how a “beautiful woman” is supposed to look.
My saviour was health and fitness. I made it my area of expertise. I’m not obsessive about exercise or diet, but I know my stuff, I know I am strong and fit and able, and that gives me my self-confidence. I have been no stranger to a distorted or destructive self-image, + feel lucky to have arrived at the more balanced healthy place I now occupy. I’ve been there too, and now understanding women’s (and especially, mothers’) bodies and working to make them feel better about them is my passion.
But exercise and healthy eating doesn’t make me look like Cindy Crawford.
As Cindy Crawford once said, “I wish I looked like Cindy Crawford”.
Airbrushing and deception, now THAT has a lot to answer for.
Yes, we KNOW they’re not real. But we’re human and it’s in our faces, every bloody day.
So what’s a normal woman with a few stretch marks and a few more pounds than she thinks she should be carrying to do? Nothing, if she doesn’t want to. And let’s all leave her alone. And if she does want to do something, from working out and eating well to plastic flippin’ surgery, let’s leave her be too. She didn’t just become vain and shallow, she simply made a choice to make herself feel better. But please can we stop pretending 1. that these media images are real and 2. that they don’t matter.
Hi Nadine, I just read your blog post, which I really enjoyed & I don’t think we actually disagree very much at all! I have often written about the need to instil body & self confidence into both ourselves & especially to our children. But I don’t think you can totally disassociate our mothers’ & other influences in our childhoods FROM the images & supposed ideals that they also have been fed. I am a BIG believer in self responsibility & this blog is full of it! This is one example. To just blame the media & walk away is clearly evading our own responsibility to love ourselves & to teach our children to do the same. I’d like us to rise above it, & talked here about how I didn’t actually think we were all as gullible as *we* think! Thanks so much for your comment & I do hope you enjoy more of my blog, I look forward to more of yours!
I have to disagree. Why is it the media’s fault that we have low self esteem? Self esteem is developed from the very early years of childhood, by our parents, guardians and other influences. Media? Not so much. I believe that if we were not so conditioned to be unhappy with ourselves, and were actually taught just how beautiful we really are for a change, the images that media project to us would not have nearly as strong an impact.Â
You may find this interesting:Â http://yourlife-parttwo.blogspot.com/
Hi Nadine, I just read your blog post, which I really enjoyed & I don’t think we actually disagree very much at all! I have often written about the need to instil body & self confidence into both ourselves & especially to our children. But I don’t think you can totally disassociate our mothers’ & other influences in our childhoods FROM the images & supposed ideals that they also have been fed. I am a BIG believer in self responsibility & this blog is full of it! This is one example. To just blame the media & walk away is clearly evading our own responsibility to love ourselves & to teach our children to do the same. I’d like us to rise above it, & talked here about how I didn’t actually think we were all as gullible as *we* think! Thanks so much for your comment & I do hope you enjoy more of my blog, I look forward to more of yours!
Thank you so much for the mention Wendy. I think it’s so important that we all talk about this x
Thank you so much for the mention Wendy. I think it’s so important that we all talk about this x